Algernon and John are sitting on a large glass table, waiting for their meal.
Algernon: I hear the share prices are going up this year, is that any good to you? Afterall you are one for fine dining and money like that could come handy.
John: what are you trying to say?
Algernon: why do you always assume something else?
John: i know you well Algy, you ALWAYS mean something else
Enters Lane
Algernon: Lane, may i ask what is taking so long? i havent eaten since 5'oclock and i am rather peckish.
Lane: Yes sir, sorry sir it only requires time for heating up now
John: well in that case im going to have a cigarette
John brandishes a cigarette case from his pocket and lights it up. Lane leaves
John: do you want a cigarette? go on live a little
Algernon: certainly not! its a disgusting habit
John picks up his glass of wine and takes a swig.
John: say this wine tastes rather vintage, im impressed
Lane enters, wheeling in a large trolley
Lane hands over a silver plate to first Algernon then John.Algernon: I've been waiting for this since afternoon
John: yes we do know how you love your food (laughs)
Algernon: are you mocking me?
John: i had no such intention
John and Algernon finish their meal. John leaves the room and Lane is left cleaning up the table.
Lane: Sir, John has left his cigarette case here
Algernon: put it somewhere and i'll return it to him on his next visit. the forgetful fool!
-Good introduction for both characters and an understanding of the relationship between them
ReplyDelete-However I think more time spent on the directions and spelling will make it even better
WWW. Good understand of the relationship between Algernon and Jack.Some good use of Victorian era language.
ReplyDeleteEBI-the lack of use of stage direction is an issue , more comfortable language between the two friends will make it flow better.
Good start though keep it up!
www a good attempt to emulate the characterisations. You have tried to play with them and show some kind of banter between them
ReplyDeleteebi you had made more of the cigarette case, perhaps explored their friendship and closeness more, the subjects we know they must talk about is a good way to start.